How can you find out what you love to do?
My quick take on how to find the sweet spot for your career.
This is part 3 of 4 of a series called “Finding My Own Path.”
In case you missed it, here’s part 1 and 2.
As a kid, whenever I was asked, "What do you love to do?" I remember I would always say "I like computer games" or "I like soccer."
Looking back, it really seems like I only said that because they were fun, not because I got some sense of meaning or fulfillment from it (which is what I assume you mean by finding what you "love to do").
This distinction is important because "fun" is a HUGE part of being a kid. At that age, our minds aren't sophisticated enough to grasp concepts like "meaning" or "purpose."
As a kid, the "why" for doing something can be sufficiently answered with "because I want to" or "because I'm having FUN... Can't you see?!?"
But as an adult, it takes a little more for us to say "Wow, I love doing this... I could do this for the rest of my life!"
So here's what "finding what I love to do" means to me:
A.) Having autonomy
I need to be able to dictate how often, when to speed up or slow down, or when I want to immerse myself and when I take a break.
Being able to dictate the frequency and intensity is important.
Having the creative freedom to try a new method, alternative way of thinking, or validate a theory is also a critical component.
This is one of main reasons why I've never really had a typical 9-5 job.
B.) Being challenged/stretched
If what I'm doing becomes mundane, repetitive, and mindless, it's no longer engaging and no longer gives me the dopamine rush of accomplishment.
If there's no more sense of growth, no higher goal to shoot for, or no "next level" of mastery, it becomes boring and hard to be fully present.
I used to make $35-40/hr as one of those guys that stood in front of Walmart/Target to gather signatures for petitions. I was so bored out of my mind repeating the exact same words for hours on end that I quit after 1 week... true story!
C.) Seeing a correlation between real-world impact and my growth
If I'm being challenged and stretched, chances are, I'm growing as well. But if there aren't any actual benefits as a result of the growth, then there's a huge feeling of, "Well then why did I bother doing that?"
A good example of this is becoming more competent at work, but never receiving recognition for it, whether it be a bonus, promotion, raise, or simple acknowledgement from superiors.
If I study about sales/marketing and it directly affects my business, that's pretty satisfying.
If I study charisma, develop my speaking abilities, and learn how to network, and that directly affects who I get to meet, who I become friends with, or the opportunities I'm exposed to, that's very satisfying.
If I provide real solutions to people in need and make money at the same time, that's meaningful.
If I practice writing more thoughtful answers on Quora and more people comment about how helpful it was, that's meaningful too.
So for me, as long as whatever I'm doing or plan to do falls in within those boundaries, I know I'm going to love what I'm doing.
The greatest joys of life often lie in the journey, not in having arrived.
This framework that I have is derived from Self Determination Theory. You can read more here, and watch more here:
This answer was originally published on Quora and had over 91,000 views.
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